that actually makes sense

"The W is bigger than the binoculars. You'll see."

We are all now dumber for hearing that

Aaron just informed me that Starship Troppers has a third movie just releasing on DVD. He's queuing it up on Netflix and there is nothing I can do to stop him. I did make him sit through the Kite Runner, but I need to que something far more excruciating for him. AS it is, we are painfully watching National Treasure 2 right now. I hate Nick Cage...he might suck more than Bruce Willis...I don't know, that's debatable. this movie suuuuucks.

its spongebob nudey pants

We signed the papers, it is official, we live in the PAC. Of course we went back to the crumby apartment afterward. The movers aren't coming till Friday. Aaron and I get to seal all the grout and tile over the next two days...and there is a lot of tile. It should be good times. Today we're going to go to the school, post, and clubhouse (so the kids can ride the swirling waterslide). I'm ready to get back to a routine. I'm ready to unhook the kids from spongebob--yes, I've been lazy with the TV at the apartment; I know I'm going to pay for it when we detox.

we represent the lollipop guild

I was watching the Wizard of Oz with the ladies the other day. Glinda, the good witch, pestered Dorothy trying to determine if she was a good witch or a bad witch. But then later on, Glinda reveals that only bad witches are ugly...so what was Glinda implying before: that dorothy was ugly enough that Glinda couldn't determine Dorothy's status as a witch? Was she confused because Dorothy was soo ugly that she had to be a bad witch, but then she killed a wicked witch, so maybe she was good. Sounds like a backhanded compliment to me. Stuck up, foo-foo good witch that sends poor butt-ugly Dorothy on a wild goose chase to Oz. Oh and munchkins are freaky.

forty winks

Did I mention that I am tired....more tired than newborn baby, more tired than moving day, more tired than saw 8 houses in one day....Aaron and I went to bed last night at 2:30am and then (Guten) Morgan was ready to go at 5:30a this morning. Long day with the girls. After we went swimming I thought they might wipe out for a nap. But no, no naps. It is almost 11p and I can't keep my eyes open. I'm trying to finish up sean's website for him, but my eyes are shutting as I crop pix. Tomorrow, I'll finish. tomorrow. Please children: sleep to 7a. 7a is all I ask.

jazz hands

Amber and I were discussing ward cliques today. She has some crazy retard girls in her ward...but I'm sure we all do. Man 2 had all the bitter betties that didn't get invited on the cruise that about 20 couples from our ward went on last feb.

And it is a fine line. Naturally, we get along with certain people better than others. And we shouldn't have to feel responsible for including the entire ward when you decide to get together with friends...I think it is ridiculous to expect everyone to be your friend and include you in all their frivolities.

But there is a difference between being friends and being friendly. I think there is no excuse for not being friendly, especially when it is at a ward gathering...I'm not saying don't sit by your friends or hang out with your friends at the functions...just don't be rude to others that might want to chat at the event. Is that really so difficult? We lived across the street from coo-coo-choo-choo, but did I talk to her every week at church? Yes. It is just being kind. Am I perfect, no. I hope I'm not being hypocritical by writing this...I really do try to be kind and friendly to everyone.

Do I like everyone? No. Am I friends with everyone? no. Do I try to mix it up in RS/ward parties/groups, so that I talk to others that I don't know very well? Yes. I'm not saying everyone should do this...it works for me. I like to get to know everyone. But I don't expect them to all be my friends...just friendly back. And I am crazy, so I understand and don't take offense if others don't want to be my friend. No tears are shed. I don't know, ward cliques just make me nuts when they choose to be rude to others at ward gatherings. When I hear about things people say and do to others that is just rude, it makes my heart hurt and then I become fierce. I lock & load my claws and I'm ready for a nasty cat fight...no, I'm all talk. But I feel the fierceness build in me and I want to say something...

Aaron and I try to be Switzerland in the ward. Neutral...not cliquish, not discriminating about who we are friendly to. It works for us. We don't get caught up in the crap and we don't get offended by crappers. Christy, my new neighbor, was telling me the ward and our neighborhood is bit cliquish...I believe it is everywhere though. I just feel bad that Christy feels excluded. Maybe I can make my Switzerland a safe haven for everyone. We'll see.

Cómo estás? beeeches

So after our Evergreen experience last week, we had no idea what to expect in our soon-to-be ward today. We got there during the hymn before the opening prayer, and we had to sit on the third row from the very back of the cultural hall. We bumped the ward's primary kid count over 200 today. Lauren, Bryn and Ava each had 16+ kids in their classes. We thought we had a big ward in American Fork with 180 kids. The YM/YW is also crazy big. The bishopric told us they have about 3 new families each week. This is understandable since the PAC is building loads of homes. There was a bunch of speculation among the members that a split would happen soon. Aaron and I were shocked but grateful to have a similar ward experience from what we just left in Utah. The majority of parents look like they are in their 30's and 40's. And I met the family that lives two houses down from us during RS. She seems really nice. They have a book club and a play group which we will join but not until September...the book club is reading Stephanie Meyer (and while I did read twilight in 1 day and was entertained--but not compelled to read the others--I don't think I could stomach another) right now and I have a feeling I will grossly disagree with their opinions of the book. Hell I haven't even read it and I can deconstruct her characters and writing style to make them into what they are: cheap, easy mormon porn commercial entertainment...that might be a bit harsh, and hypocritical...I just wrote my first story and it probably isn't as well written. So while I may seem a bit biting, I do give her huge credit for creating a series that transcends its target audience and appeal. It's just not my bag, baby. I'm excited to be a part of this ward. I think it will help with our transition.

the light is greeeeeeen

We signed a contract today for a PAC house. We're going to ram through the loan and try to close on the 29th. Which is perfect because I'll have 2 weeks to settle in before Lauren starts school. Of course, Aaron is gone all next week to Texas, so I get to do final inspection, loan processing, etc. all by myself again. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate Aaron's hard work so that we can do this...but boohoo, I'm doing this with 4 kids on my hip. Aaron might be out of town the week we move in too. This is his crazy time at work, so smashing in a move is not making life relaxed for him either. If Grandma Wilson passes, we will have covered all the major life changes one can have under one year. It is nuts...ooooh, Aaron just got home with a baguette, boursin, and genoa salami. peace out.

marsha, marsha, marsha

Why is it, when I pray, that the answer is always "patience?" Seriously, you would think Heavenly Father knows me better than that. I suck at patience. I express ship everything! (That's right, I used an exclamation point--because I was shouting that sentence, just then. I shouted...with an exclamation point; you feel me?)

Whenever I ask for something big: patience. I want babies: patience; I want Aaron to get a new job: patience; I want to find a house: patience; I want to publish: patience. Patience, patience, patience. I'm trying but it sucks. I'm a get it done kinda girl. I like to make it happen, capt'n.

Patience sucks. I hate it. I'm sure that's why He keeps trying to teach it to me. The Lord's time does not match my Now. Don't get me wrong, I fully understand working for it; I'm not Veruca Salt. But if I'm working toward something, I need results. Eye on the prize. I like to check off my boxes....not wait around for someone/thing else to check it for me. swine patience.

I guess I should be grateful that patience is the answer instead of "Hell no." I should be grateful that my biggest problem right now in my life is working on being more patient. And I am grateful. Very. I know I am the fresh prince living the sweet life of bel air right now. So I guess I'll suck it up. Arrrrrr, it is hard though.

This burrito is delicious but it is filling

Yeah, it is midnight and I just finished submitting to a dozen lit agents. The whole submission process is a roller coaster of emotion: am I too cliche, is the writing strong enough, do my armpits smell... I could be delusional. I feel like I can publish, and the next second, I feel like it's crap that britney spears could write. I don't want to categorize my story as middle grade fantasy because I pretty much hate fantasy. I prefer calling it adventure with a touch of magic. But is that just calling dramatic: passionate? Nat and Adam are reading it right now, they have given me a ton of good feedback...you think you're done and then you realize you need to revise another ten times. eeeeeh. We'll see what happens.

So we have been in Denver for a full week today. Finding a house is exhausting. The problem is that Aaron doesn't have to go into the office every day and then the office is downtown. So that leaves the entire metro area as living potential. We ruled out Evergreen (sadly, we doubled the ward's primary on sunday), Broomfield/Westminster (over rated), Littleton (too far from the airport) Lakewood (too old), Highlands Ranch (claustrophobic)...which leaves us with Golden, Parker and Posh Aurora.

We're leaning toward posh Aurora because it is about 20 minutes closer to the airport and work compared to parker. Golden's problem is the same as Evergreen's: one itty bitty ward. I'm dragging Jacqui through PAC (posh arapahoe county: my own nickname for it. It is funny though, the whole area is plastered with signs saying Blah Blah in Arapahoe County, because they are embarrassed to call it by its real name of ghetto Aurora. And it is true, about 90% of Aurora is ghetto. Just check out the schools in Aurora on greatschools.net. The majority of elementaries rate 1's and 2's. You gotta try to earn that low. Of course all the schools in PAC are 10's and 9's. A definite plus.) on Thursday.

We're going through five potentials...but I really only like 2. Aaron is soo thorough, he researches everything mega in depth. The positive, when he finally makes a decision: it's a good one. The negative: ten years. We only have our rental for three more weeks. We could close in that time if we made an offer this weekend. But I don't think Aaron can do that. That would be too spontaneous for him. School starts for lauren on Aug 18th. We need to commit and get over it. We will always be able to find another house that has potential. They say home buying is an emotional decision...although we've researched/driven/sleuthed till no emotion is left. Every day I drive the neighborhoods evaluating everything for a couple of hours. The girls have been super troopers. Although, I think tomorrow we'll just lay around the pool. I'm wiped of house shopping.

seriously? Who throws a shoe?

The government bailing out the housing market is a terrible no good slippery slope to further shackle us into government dependence. Wow, are we no longer responsible for our own actions? Good or bad: we need accountability, not gov't bail out.

I can't believe it's not butter

Toni sent me this blog for kicks and giggles today: http://seriouslysoblessed.blogspot.com/. The blog is a mockumentary but it encapsulates a lot of mormon pop culture and behavior. This behavior is exactly why all of our non-member friends think Mormons are ridiculous. And sure, we're all ridiculous for different reasons; I'm constantly living on my own elevation of crazy. But after reading three entries of this thing, I threw up a little in my mouth. Why? Because while this may be a farce, I can name at least ten girls from my ward that fit this personification. Don't get me wrong, they are sweet spirits (and a few, I consider friends) but all the scrapbooking/stephanie-meyers-harliquin-mormon-romance/Janice Kapp/fluffy kitten poop makes blood shoot from my eyes.

I have an opinion...

NuvaRing is grotty.

Holy sh!t, holy sh!t, a swordfish almost went through my head

It is funny how opposite life can change in just seven years. Seven years ago, I would have given my lung to miss a period and know that I was pregnant. I fell to my knees in gratitude when we found out we were pregnant with Lauren. Those few years of infertility were a miserable, awful, no good time. And it was a pathetic struggle compared to others (like my cousin Candace who did invitro twice before she got her son). When we finally figured out what was wrong with me, having kids became easy. I'd pop a clomid pill and in 1-4 months I would get pregnant. Problem solved. No need for birth control, my eggs didn't release on their own. We became foot loose and fancy free. Oh course, Morgan's miracle combustion really threw off my life plan: clomid for four and then let a miracle happen if we needed more. Of course the miracle came after 3. And I'm barely treading with four. So now I live in constant fear of getting pregnant. I actually took the mini pill while I was nursing. But now that Morgan is on the bottle, I need stronger insurance. Nance gave me some, but I can't start it till after my monthly plague ends.

Which brings me to today. I took a pregnancy test today. I'll end the suspense: it was negative. It was an over precaution, I henny-pennyed for sure. But now I can sleep in peace. Sweet relief. If I could tell my 7-year-ago self that I would be celebrating a negative today, I think it would be incomprehensible.